I guess I left you all hanging a week or so ago. I had emergency brain surgery last Friday in an attempt to remove Howard, my brain tumor. They were able to remove the majority of him but he left tentacles behind. Howard is a glioblastoma, which is an aggressive cancer located in a spot in my brain where they can’t be aggressive surgically.
None of us get out of this thing we call life alive and it seems I’ve been given an expiration date.
But, here’s how it’s going to go …
This picture is my new normal for now. My sister visited yesterday and took me out on the balcony for some fresh air. It felt amazing and wonderful after 8 days in the hospital. I am in rehab now doing intensive physical and occupational therapy and building new neural pathways so my right arm and leg learn to function again. I’ve lost strength just from sitting around, but the real problem is proprioception, meaning I can’t tell where my arm and leg are in space. So new pathways, with repetition, will help make that happen.
In a couple weeks I’ll begin radiation and chemo simultaneously which is supposed to kill off the rest of Howard. That lasts 6 weeks, then I’ll get a 4 week break and begin a higher dose of chemo without the radiation. While going through that I’ll be looking at all the trials, recommendations, and suggestions everyone has shared. There are some encouraging options out there. (Update: I now understand that the tentacles never are really killed off. They grow back at some time and the treatments hopefully slow them down and keep them from spreading rapidly).
In the meantime Ron and I know how to do this. We’ll continue to live, laugh, love, joke, have fun, cry a little, feel all the feels, and make the most out of every moment we have.
I have found out I have some truly amazing, supportive friends, and I feel more blessed than I ever knew possible. I’m staying positive but holding enough energy inside to put up a good fight against Howard’s offspring! I welcome prayers, Reiki, and whatever speaks to you, not only for me, but Ron, and my family. They need more support than I do at this time. Love to all. Remember to Live, love, and laugh!
Ribbons of love from my heart to yours, Pam
